Monday, September 19, 2011

I'm 31 this week! Serious thoughts on life.....

So, this time last year my life was perfectly normal.  I had just had a baby and gotten married to the man of my dreams.  Aaron started school and then it was my 30th birthday.  Fast forward 8 days when I went to hospital for an ultrasound to get a lump on my breast checked and they had to do a biopsy and mammogram as well because there was something there that shouldn't be.  They told me to come back up for results 2 days later and to bring someone with me.  Friday 1st October myself and G sat in a room and heard the news that would change our lives forever!  Since then I've had a mastectomy, reconstruction and had chemo.  I've been bald, worn a wig and posted photos of myself wearing absolutely no makeup.  I've realised that you only get one life, you might as well enjoy it.  I have 2 gorgeous little boys and the most wonderful husband that I could possibly ask for!
Its now 2 days before I turn 31.  I can't believe how much has happened and how quickly the past year has gone by.  This might sound like a lot of gobbeldygook to you but I have so much in my head that I want to get out and its all trying to come out at the same time!  I'm just thankful to be alive and that I got that lump checked out, otherwise I might not be here today.  Sometimes I hate my reconstructed boob as its fairly heavy and square compared to my other one but I have to think of the alternative, its only a boob and I'm alive!!  Sometimes I completely forget that I had cancer then it all comes crashing back to me in a flashback and its very strange and hard to describe how it makes me feel! I just feel like a normal person apart from being so tired all the time but I'm hoping my energy levels will get back to normal soon!!  I often forget how G must have felt when he heard the news, he's been my best friend in the world for nearly 14 years now and I can only imagine what it must have been like to be in his shoes at the time.  People always asked how I was but not many asked how G was coping.  It must have been hell for him to try and keep things together at home for the kids when I was in hospital and going through chemo.  I know it must have been awful for him to have to shave my head with foam and a razor after the little bits started falling out all over the place.  There isn't many men I know that has had to shave their wifes head completely bald!  He's really been my rock through this whole saga and I would be lost without him!!


  1. You've been through so much in one year Jacinta, both physically and emotionally, no wonder you're tired...
    I'm sending you lots of love and warm thoughts and wish you a great 31st birthday on Wednesday, and a long and happy life with G and your 2 gorgeous boys XX

    Catharina (@ILoveIre)

  2. Happy Belated Birthday! I hope you had a wonderful day :-)